history

[|intended parents] "The history of BUA does not involve murder, but does involve pretty much everything else." So says an ex-teacher and so says the historical record.

The history of BUA, while rather short, is still extensive. Some of it isn't really that interesting or particularly useful. One part that is useful is a history of pranks and hacks, providing both the basis for new hacks, a list of hacks to top, or, if any teachers are reading this, a way to prevent copycats from repeating the older hacks forcing them to try newer more original hacks.

COMMENTS FOR SRDJAN DIVAC

He's the man. Knows at least four languages, and is the teacher who is most likely to be a secret agent. Also, he made a ton of money during the dot com boom, so now, he's a millionaire.

Yeah, he may knows 4 languages but how do you know he speaks other languages which is not English that well. Tell him stop showing off for what he is not. And no matter he is a millionaire or billionaire a guy like this should not get any praise from any one. And tell him that today is the anniversary 2 years since his unborn child that he wanted me to kill ,dead by today.IF THE BABY STILL ALIVE HE OR SHE WILL BE 1.5 YEAR OLD ALREADY !!! Last Ex-ray the baby heart does existed !!!! You never gonna know how it feel like because you never cry at front of doctor and nurse at the hospital. Also tell him that if I have money enough to take care of my self, for giving birth for the baby and to take care the baby then Abortion will never happen in my life. I WILL NEVER GONNA TAKE A GUY LIKE SRDJAN DIVAC AS A FATHER OF THE BABY ,IT DOES NOT MATTER TO TAKE CARE THE BABY ALONE WITH OUT JERK.

ASK HIM TOO IF HE STILL REMEMBER THAT ONCE HE SAID HE PREFER A BABY GIRL AND WILL PAINT THE PINK ROOM FOR THE BABY !!!!! GO WEAR SKIRT SRDJAN DIVAC !!!!!!!!!

IS THIS THE GUY WHO YOU CALL HIM THE MAN.

One of the most famous pieces of BUA history, although it may not be as interesting to the new generations, is the well-known and much-loved [|BUAtrix]. Created by Charlie Hoey and other members of the class of 2001, it's a spoof on the Matrix involving Dr. Horn, Mr. Garber, Mr. Stone, and students who are now gone. It's quirky and bizarre, and probably funnier if you knew the students involved, but it's still amusing to see Horn and Garber become evil and attempt to kill students.

A few years back this girl and this boy were in a relationship. And it seemed as though they were pretty happy. They had been going out for about a year, when one day the boy took the girl out of her history class and they went for a walk. He sat her down and took out a bag of skittles and a bag of m&ms. He said, "Look, I am a skittle, and you are an m&m. We both taste great, but we just don't mix".

Garber owns a magnificent full-body gorilla suit. In days of old, he would wear this suit each Halloween and teach by writing an equation or graph on the board and then pointing while going "ooh ooh ooh." He would, as a rule, not speak a word of English the whole day. Unfortunately, one year, the calendar worked out so that Parents Day fell on Halloween. Garber kept up the shtick, conducting parent-teacher conferences in character. Some parents complained to the headmaster and that was the end of it. He also has a full-body chicken suit.

Not so much a story as a funny fact. Teachers who chaperone dances will often go drinking together later on. They get really uncomfortable when you ask them about it, but it's really funny if you know the teachers well.

There are many stories about teachers having affairs with other teachers, headmasters. But putting these on the internet would be libelous, so you'll have to ask The Right People. Of course given that teachers can't get away with having high grading standards these days, there's no way they could get away with screwing.

The room directly opposite the College Office (adjacent to Ms. Lyons room) used to be the Junior Senior Room until Events made it clear that the Jr./Sr. Room had to have as many windows as possible.

Way back in the mists of time some BUA official was reading everybody else's email. She was caught because it turned out that students were reading her email!

In a van ride back from a soccer game, a senior and junior (friends) started to fight. And by fight I mean one of them started hitting the other with an empty gatorade bottle yelling "AMX MIX TAPES". At a certain point they started punching each other. Somehow, they managed to seperate and were on opposite sides of the van (the long way), with the senior in the back and junior up front. Then the soccer balls started flying. Our calm observer was in the back but to the side, while Ms. Riemer was driving calmly to school. The climax of the fight was when the junior, now in the back as well, bit the senior on the back, and the senior screamed "AHH YOU BIT ME". Good times.

In another van ride back from the soccer game, apparently love was not in the air, but in one of the seats (it does that sometimes). So two soccer players decided that, hey, those seats are pretty comfortable. Anyways, after not talking to them for a little while, the other members of the van (and this was a pretty full van, two in the back(behind the love), two directly in front of the love, another in the most front long seat, and another in very front seat), started hearing these strange noises and they noticed that the two love-birds could not be seen. Luckily for these silent observers, Stone decided that music would be the best way to forget about these strange noises, and the radio was swiftly turned on. Unfortunatly for the two love-birds the other members of the van did not forget about the "strange noises". Indeed they decided it was necessary to make the most lewd jokes possible at the top of their lungs to the amusment of all. In the heat of the moment one observing 9th grader forgot his geometry and screamed "PERPENDICULAR" at the top of his lungs. Now every person who didnt fail Z's geometry (and who did after all?) knows he should have said parallel but he was foolish. The love birds noticed the jokes and there was much giggling on their part, but when they found out about the radio the next day, there was much "turning red of the face" going on.

This one day shortly after summer break, Mrs. Pollock (the real principal of the school) was talking to someone about how she had just lost some weight over the previous summer. Specifically, she was talking about how enjoyable it was for her to watch various teachers of the male persuasion attempt to compliment her without saying "do me now". Stone, overhearing this, promptly walked past her, stopped, gave her the up-and-down eye, and said "DAMN Cathy, looking hott" and walked off.

In 2005, two students created the "Women are inferior" group on Facebook, which was comprised of (TAKE THAT, HORN!) mainly BUA students. Tracy found out and was very angry. He forced the two students to do an ASM about internet common sense. One of the students didn't show up. The other did and gave the most beastmode ASM of all time. He dryly read from a powerpoint list of things not to do, following each with an oh so serious "Mm-hmm." Every few bullet points, a hammer and sickle would flash across the screen. Half way through, we reached a slide called "Intermission" for which the presenter sat down in the front row with a bag of popcorn to watch a several-minute video of a football play in which Michael Vick scored an epic touchdown. Nobody stopped him, and at the end of the video, he resumed his presentation. The punchline is that Tracy slept in that morning and never had a clue.

On another occasion, a headmaster gave lecture during faculty meeting about how in the future, humanity was no longer going to be humanity and how the purpose of BUA is to train the people who are going to become the first "Friborgs" who will eventually evolve into Star Children. (Thankfully that headmaster is long gone and our purpose is now to train Good Citizens and Well Rounded People.) This became very funny when the school hired a man named Friborg. We're still waiting for them to hire a Star Child.

In 2008 a freshman (who later left) snuck out during camp wing, and thinking he saw Gruver he shined the flashlight in his face only to find Mr. Dent.

At the 2009 senior breakfast, Petsky gave a speech reading out of the phonebook. At the end, he gave out Dr. Davis's cell phone number. Berkman was pissed.

In 2009, one of the first ASMs involved a presentation about beavers. One slide was a picture of a beaver's scent glands, conveniently located on the tissue inside the anus.

In 2010 a sophomore and a freshman preformed a 10 minute play about a first date that caused Mr. Berkman to later give a lecture about "blow jobs".

In 2010 one senior waited in another seniors backyard for hours during assassins.

In 2012 a junior found some weed in the head of a bear head that someone had left in the Jr/Sr room. Apparently it wasn't good weed, according to one teacher.

In 2012 two seniors ran around the history winter final, one in a bear suit and another chasing him with a nerf gun.

Wow, it's been a while since this website was last edited. And it's still up too, despite Wikispaces now being closed down! Anyways, it seems that this community handbook, like many other things, has been buried in history, forgotten. It has been 6 years since the history of BUA has been updated; 2012, to me at least, seems like a long while back. So long back, in fact, that I only know what has happened from 2015 up until now. Well, no matter. It simply can't be helped. So let's get this show on the road!
 * May 2018: Update**

I am not the same person (or group of people) who wrote the history above this update. I am a BUA student, and that's all you really need to know about me to understand what kind of a person I am. I work hard on both fronts: home and school. Time is spent on studying and extracurricular activities. Sleep takes up a much smaller portion of the day than what is healthy. True relaxation is rare, typically felt during those 3-month summer vacations and 3-week long winter vacations. Do note that even then, you might have something to do. After those breaks, it's time to get the show on the road again, or you're off to college. Obvious enough to my peers, and it will quickly become obvious to future students, I assure you.

I have no idea where to start in continuing work on this handbook. I don't know much about this document, apart from the introduction to it on the homepage of this handbook. In addition, I found about this little gem of BUA history only recently, and only just now finished reading everything in it. I became interested in this site (which is apparent because I am updating it). And now, I plan to update it. So here goes.

I think it is pretty obvious when I say that a lot of things have changed since this handbook was left alone. It does not look obvious from the outside, but you all remember this extremely common proverb "don't judge a book by its cover". We can apply that here. The building is the same little structure that sits in the corner of arguably one of the busiest intersections in Boston. The Charles River still runs behind the building, all that stuff. Nice. Let's carry on.

Our school logo and motto have changed. Gone is the shield, gone is "Nil doctis arduum". In its place, a rectangular, more modern-looking logo. The new motto: "Learning without limits." Standardized, sharper, but the characteristic red and white colors still remain. These are the words that instantly come to mind when I think of the new logo and motto. This is arguably the largest change to the external appearance of the school (but these changes are surprisingly mostly seen inside the building), and the only one that I can remember.

BUA's faculty has changed a lot. A new headmaster joined BUA when I was a freshman. Some other members of the faculty and staff have left, and some new people have joined. Regardless of whoever joined or left, everyone is awesome all the same, and I can't thank them enough for the help they've given to the students, including me. I might tell you more about the changes in the faculty and staff later. Catching up is work enough already, lol. Up and at 'em, lads!

The student body today seems very similar to the student body described in the older parts of this handbook. A bright, lively, and close-knit group that's not afraid to do the unusual once in a while. The only real difference I see when comparing the both student bodies, is that the current student body (almost the entirety of it) would never dream of doing the extreme things listed here in the history webpage. Peers of mine who read the handbook were mind-boggled to find out about some of the stuff written here (and for the most part died laughing). I was surprised too, I'll admit. But do remember, this is BUA. Crazy things are possible here, a lot of crazy things have happened already, and a lot more are to come. Just don't expect the craziness to rise to the level it once was, is all, and that's good.

Curriculum? It seems that barely anything has changed. College courses remain part of the BUA curriculum (and they should). Classics are still a big theme at BUA. Remember the Iliad and the Odyssey? Yup, still a thing. History is partitioned into several categories (European history, ancient Greeks/Romans, and American history, etc.). Learning Latin and Greek are still requirements even though there are a lot of people who are pushing for modern language courses instead (or as an alternative option). There was even a modern language pilot program a while back. I don't know much about it or how that worked out, and to me that's ok because I wasn't in it. If it's not my business, in it I shall not poke into.

I think I will stop here for now. As I wrote the previous statement, I lost the mood to continue any further. This is because I realized that I stapled a packet (for homework) the wrong way, and I am unhappy at the mistake. Furthermore, as I was correcting this blunder of mine, I found that my stapler had run out of staples, and now I an even unhappier at the fact that now I have to walk to get more staples, which are always stuck together in those characteristic several-thousand bundles. Last but not least, I also remembered that I have unfinished work to tackle, with 2 writing assignments pursuing me and final exams looming behind them. But don't worry, I will be back. Rest assured, I shall defeat these academic articles, continue in my quest to update this public forum. //Valete, amici!//

//- WZ//